Mom’s Corner

Parenting Tip

August 27, 2012 by Betty

“Mom, Chico did this…” “Mom, Mei did this…” Mom,…” “Mom,…” With three kids so close in age, I’m faced with daily bickering amongst the kids and power struggles when it comes to the area of obedience. While looking at some parenting tips, I came across this parenting tip from http://www.biblicalparenting.org/that gives me some ideas on how to address my issue. I hope to hear your comments on it.

Start of Article:

What Cues Do You Give Your Children?

An Action Point is the point when you stop talking and start acting or the point when children know you mean business. How do they know? You give them cues and your children know what those cues are. If you’re saying the same thing over and over again, how does your child know when the Action Point is near?

Think back on your own childhood. How did you know when your dad or mom meant business? Maybe they used your middle name or started moving toward the kitchen where that special utensil was kept. They might have gotten out of the chair or started moving toward you or given you that look.

For many parents, angry words or a harsh tone of voice become the cue children look for. Unfortunately, this harshness creates distance in the relationship. Look for ways to tighten your Action Point without anger.

Harshness isn’t necessary but firmness is. Firmness with children is an important part of the teaching process. Some parents associate firmness with an authoritarian style of parenting. And it certainly can be. We’re not suggesting that you become a sergeant with your kids. Even a relational parenting style often requires a point in which that child knows that the discussion is over and it’s time for action.

You might say, “Katie, please turn off the TV now.” The child’s name and the word “now” can become the cues that your Action Point is coming. Or you might preface what you’re going to say with the words, “Katie, look at me. This is an instruction.”

Be careful of multiple warnings as they can weaken the instruction process. One warning may be helpful to make sure the child has understood the instruction but then the next step should be a firm follow through. If you tighten your Action Point and are ready with the follow through, you’ll get angry less often and your children will respond more quickly. Start by clarifying the cues and following through sooner.

This parenting tip comes from the book Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
This teaching is also available on CD or as MP3 downloads under the title, Eight Secrets to Highly Effective Parenting, live seminars taught by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

If this tip was sent to you by a friend and you’d like to continue to receive tips yourself, you can sign up at http://www.biblicalparenting.org/.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: parenting tips, What cues do you give your kids when it comes to disciplining? Disciplining style

Encouragement for Moms

August 16, 2012 by Betty

I came across this article from Focusonlinecommunities.com that touched my heart and I wanted to share it with you. It’s a letter written by Trevin Wax who is the managing editor of the Gospel Project. The letter is written to a “stay-at-home mom” and it talks about our inadequacies and God’s grace. To me, the article applies not only to stay-at-home moms, but to single parents or parents who have lost hope in “raising the perfect” child. I won’t give everything away…you have to read it.

Below is the letter and I love to get your reaction to it.

Dear Stay-at-Home Mom,

You are a gift of God to your husband and your kids.

But you don’t always feel that way, do you?

There’s a low-level feeling of guilt that creeps into your heart from time to time. Sometimes it bubbles over into tears, usually on lonely, difficult days.

You scan blogs and read books about being a good mom. You find some helpful tidbits here and there, often from women who are grandmothers now. Women you can learn from but who seem to have forgotten the struggle. They seem to have it all together.

In your heart, you want to be the kind of mom who trains up kids to make a difference for the kingdom. You know it’s an honor to be entrusted with these kids. You know you’ve only got one shot. You want to be the mom who teaches them the Bible, models how to pray, and trains them up in the fear of the Lord.

But most of the time you feel like you’re barely holding it all together.

Your house cleaning can’t keep up with your kids’ mess-making.

The kids embarrass you by acting up right when your guests arrive.

Your husband doesn’t get just how worn out you are by the end of the day.

You come to the end of your patience. You lose your temper. Then you feel worse.

The last thing you consider yourself to be is a “good mom.” And you think to yourself, It’ll be a miracle if my kids turn out okay.

And – surprisingly – that’s right where God wants to meet you. The place where you admit your powerlessness and your need for Him.

It’s only by God’s grace that any kid grows up to be a force for the kingdom.

You see, there are no perfect kids and no perfect mothers. No matter what you read in blogs, see in magazines, and learn in books. There are sinful kids and sinful moms and dads.

And the only thing greater than both is the grace of God. The God who says “there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” The God who loves to forgive, to transform, and empower.

God loves you – not because you are a good mother but just because you are His precious child.

God loves you – not because you’ve mastered all the skills of parenting but because He has.

It’s divine grace that will transform your parenting – not guilt.

It’s grace that will keep you going and serving and scrubbing when you’re exhausted and worn out.

It’s grace that will conquer your feelings of inadequacy and remind you of God’s love for you in Christ.

It’s grace that goes for the heart of your kids, not just their behavior.

God has demonstrated the fullness of His love for you through the cross of His Son, even while you were still a sinner.

He has promised you His presence.

He has spoken His approval over you in Christ.

He is the perfect Father who delights in you as a daughter.

Find in Him your Treasure and Joy. Be to others what He is to you.

So walk in freedom. Let Him hold you together when everything seems to be falling apart.

Bask in His unfailing love for you. And rest in His promise of power.

Betty

Filed Under: Encouragement Tagged With: parenting, Raising kids

How to Grow Kale From Seeds

August 13, 2012 by admin

For my first post, I wanted to share about a super food that I have grown to love, kale. It’s one of those hardy greens that can be easily grown from seeds or starts. In my rooky days, I’ve used kale starts purchased from the farmer’s market. But after a couple of years of growing organic produce in my backyard, I started my kale bounty from seeds. You can start seeds directly in your planter box or use small pots or paper-type egg cartons like I did below. These Costco egg cartons are great because they are free, biodegradable, and easy to transplant when they are ready. I’m all about reuse and recycle!

I started my seeds in early spring, sometime in April with seeds I purchased from New Seasons and Fred Meyer. You can also buy your kale seeds from Amazon or you might try Kale Toscano or Lacinato variety from Amazon. By two to three weeks old, like the picture below, they are ready to be transplanted. I simply use my hands and pull the individual “egg slots” apart and put it in the soil, egg carton and all!

Once your kale looks like the picture below or younger you can harvest the leaves for a yummy baby kale salad. I personally love baby kale salads, that’s why I planted them closer together so that they don’t grow too big and I harvest them often. Kale likes moist soil so make sure you water those babies. For a fall and winter harvest, plant kale again in July or August. Kale tastes best in cold weather. Heat, on the other hand, has a way of making kale bitter tasting. By the way, my kale survived the snow last year and I had the sweetest kale after the frost.